Tamar and Vince: Making It Through Love and War

I can’t even get a word in before I fall out laughing on the floor. Apparently, Tamar Braxton has done something that puts her in “time out” with her husband, Vince Herbert. Hilarious, full of love and never a dull moment, the married reality stars of We tv's Tamar & Vince are the epitome of fun love. Tamar and Vince shared their secrets to a happy marriage with EBONY.com, and the moments they fell for each other.

Vince Herbert: Hi Melanie! I’m going to get my interview done and then I’ll give you Tamar. She’s on punishment right now.

EBONY: Of course she is! [laughs] First of all, congratulations on the show, the season was amazing!

Tamar and Vince: Thank you, thank you so much.

EBONY: How do you feel about the first season? 

Tamar Braxton: It was a lot watching some of the arguments that we had. We had to relive them all over again. But the show definitely brought us closer; we talked about things that we wouldn’t normally talk about on a daily basis. It made us kind of deal with some issues that we were both having.

EBONY: In terms of working with your husband on camera, how did you balance keeping certain things private while also being very public?

TB: I was relieved to be working with my family, because the Braxton Family Values is no different, you know? We’re together all the time in real life and we’re pretty much glued to each other. But you know, Vince is a lot. A lot of people think I’m the diva, but he’s the “divo.” He’s Vincent B. Herbert, divo extraordinaire.

EBONY: What did you both learn was your favorite aspect of each other during the show?

TB: Vince and I have been together for a while. One thing I’ve always admired about Vince is his sensitivity and his compassion for other people.

EBONY: Vince, what about you? Is there anything about Tamar that made you say, “Oh my God, I love this about her”?

VH: One thing I recognized was that Tamar has been who she is from day one. I guess I fell more in love with her, if I can say that.

EBONY: Tamar, share the moment when you realized you fell in love with Vince.

TB: You know, that moment hit me at a very peculiar time. Vince and I had been friends for a while and he had a girlfriend. That’s when I felt like, “He has a girlfriend, he’s unavailable?” That kind of made me realize how special he was.

You cannot go into a relationship thinking it’s gonna be all about you. It’s not! When you get married, you become one. So you cannot be selfish.

EBONY: What about you, Vince? Tell me about the moment you knew Tamar was the one.

VH: I realized Tamar was the one when she made cocktails for me one night—

TB: [laughs]

VH: —and a friend of mine said, “Vince, that girl’s gonna marry you!”

EBONY: Do you all have any advice for couples who work together?

VH: Don’t be selfish.

TB: Yeah, you can’t be selfish and you have to designate “time”: when it’s time to work, when it’s time to have a date. If you know talking about work in the middle of date night is gonna end up in an argument, don’t talk about it then. I just feel like that’s the best advice I can give. I feel like we learn more every day. Make time for each other.

EBONY: What is your ideal date night?

VH: Magical Sundays.

TB: Magical Sundays is when we stay in our house on a Sunday. We watch a movie channel like HBO or Lifetime, and we’ll spend the whole day in the house eating, having cocktails, talking and really getting to know each other.

EBONY: Are you hoping to do a second season of Tamar and Vince?

TB: Yes! We’re not in production for it right now. Right now we’re in production for The Braxtons, and I’m really excited about that.

EBONY: And with your single “Love and War”, can we expect a follow-up album?

VH: We’re gonna put out an album, probably in February.

EBONY: We’re excited about that. I know you’re filming the Braxton Family Values, but are there any other projects coming up?

VH: Yeah, Tamar and I are working on a relationship book that we’re really excited about.

EBONY: Vince, do you have any tips for men for when it comes to being a good mate?

VH: I would say don’t be selfish.

EBONY: Tamar, is there anything you feel like women should focus on when it comes to relationships?

TB: It’s really the same rules that apply. It’s not about a woman and a man. You cannot go into a relationship thinking it’s gonna be all about you. It’s not! I know women feel strongly about some things, but you have to definitely understand that it’s not just your household. You share that with somebody else. When you get married, you become one. So you cannot be selfish and that’s just the bottom line.