How Do You Want It?<br />
A Healthy Approach to Sex Talk
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because I didn’t want to please her, but because men are taught early that not being good in bed means you’re not a real man.  I’ve grown up and realized that better sex for my partner means better sex for me.  When women are highly stimulated they are usually more comfortable and open in bed.  It’s a lesson that I try to impart on the young brothers I know, well that and the fact that each woman you have sex with is different and will enjoy sex differently.  Pay attention to her and she’ll pay attention to you.”

Realizing that we are all individuals with singular wiring, thoughts on pleasure, erogenous zones, and more, is the key to not only communicating about the lovemaking we want, but good lovemaking period.  We have to learn our partners and how to meet their needs wholly.  Being both transparent, vulnerable and empathetic in the ways we approach sex the direct course towards joy and fulfillment. 

How would you tell a lover, or like for a lover to tell you about pleasure? How do YOU want it?

Josie Pickens is a writer, activist and social commentator who blogs at www.jonubian.com.  Follow her musings on twitter at @jonubian