The world of human sexuality doesn’t typically take a mainstream stance unless it’s a slow news day or a study completely discredits previous findings. The latter happened just a few weeks ago when a study was released about the act of “squirting” known as female ejaculation. This past Christmas eve, a study conducted by a French team led by gynecologist Samuel Salama was published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, concluding that the act of squirting is actually the involuntary act of urination—completely separate from the act of female ejaculation (which consists of the emission of a milky white substance from the skene’s gland into the urethra).

The French study was conducted using seven women with no gynecological issues who volunteered to have ultrasounds performed during voluntary urination, during sexual arousal and after the squirting process. According to New Scientist, the fluid expelled from the urethra was “collected in a bag for testing, and two of the women showed no difference in the chemicals present in their urine and the fluid squirted at orgasm.” The other five women showed small amounts of PSA (prostatic-specific antigen), a component of true female ejaculate, within their fluid.

The study concluded that squirting is completely separate from female orgasmic ejaculation, and originates from the bladder becoming full during the arousal period and involuntarily emptying during orgasm. Small traces of PSA provided by the skene’s gland are said to empty into the bladder during the arousal period.

Within minutes of this study being published and breaking major headlines in the sexual community, social media went into a frenzy of responses, many of which displayed irritation and concern from women across the globe.

The issue with the study for many women is that only seven women were used as a testing group in order to make this blanket conclusion about female ejaculation, and for many who experience squirting regularly, these results couldn’t be more insulting. Twitter buzzed with women who found the study to be a subliminal attack projecting shame onto female sexual pleasure.

“While the equipment involved is similar, it doesn’t feel, smell, or taste like peeing. It feels like COMING #notpee,” tweeted one woman who consistently experiences a squirting orgasm. Hundreds of similar tweets harboring statements from women across the globe in support of squirting “not being pee” once again awakened the public’s curiosity about the coveted “squirting technique,” only to leave many confused about what exactly this phenomenon is.

For centuries, medical professionals thought this expelling of fluid was urination and recommended Kegel exercises as a way to cure what was then regarded as incontinence. But upon the discovery of the skene’s gland in the early 2000s, researchers concluded the clear fluid may come from this gland. These researchers said it was a result of sexual arousal building up what’s believed to be the equivalent of prostatic fluid found in the semen of men. This current study, however, trumps this theory all together.

According to Dr. Laura Berman, leading sex and relationship educator and therapist, the medical field still has a lot to learn about female ejaculation. “We simply don’t know where ejaculate comes from, and it’s something that doctors and researchers will continue to study and learn more about over the coming years,” she told everydayhealth.com.

While the study discredits squirting as true female ejaculation, Berman suggests every woman has the ability to experience “squirting” during orgasm, but doesn’t go into how to make that fantasy a reality for couples eager to partake in the act.

Where the French gynecologist leaves off is where I take over in explaining how to achieve the coveted act.

What does squirting feel like?

Squirting has the same “emptying” feeling as urination when achieved, except accompanied by feelings of euphoria and muscle contractions. A sudden coming forth of fluid from the urethra creates a freeing feeling like no other. The body feels light, and relaxation typically follows the act of squirting.

Can every woman squirt?

Yes. While the location and very existence of the G-spot is still highly debated, the presence of the skene’s gland has been detected in most women, each varying in size. The ability to squirt is achievable for every woman, but requires a command over the pelvic muscles and stimulation of the clitoris and G-spot. Every woman will expel a different amount of fluid depending on the size of the glands.

How can it be achieved?

By following and practicing these steps, any woman can learn how to become a squirter.

Urinate before sex

Before entering into sexual activity, it is recommended that women void the bladder to avoid contraction of a urinary tract infection. But urinating before sex also ensures the female partner that the sudden urge to pee during sex isn’t urination but the skene’s gland ready to burst. The amount of female ejaculate produced depends on the hydration level of the body and the length of time spent in the arousal stage.

Relaxation

Being tense and expecting to squirt will always cause a woman not to squirt, so the key is to create a relaxing atmosphere and a relaxed state of mind in order to encourage the act. Most women clinch down on the pelvic muscles when experiencing an orgasm or the sensation to pee during stimulation. This leads to retrograde ejaculation where the skene’s gland empties into the bladder instead. A full body massage, ambient lighting, aromatherapy candles and soft music are all ways to create a sense of relaxation before sexual activity.

Foreplay

Foreplay is often rushed through or abandoned all together during the average sexual experience. But it is foreplay that prepares a woman’s body for sex and ushers her into the last stages of arousal just before orgasm. Erotic massage, kissing, oral sex and intimate touching are all great ways to stimulate the body and mind to prepare for sex. Foreplay also helps to reduce anxiety during sex, and facilitates in helping women focus on the moment of intimacy instead of everything else happening in her world outside of sex. Foreplay sends blood rushing to the pelvis, making every part of the vulva and genitals sensitive to the touch.

Stimulation of G-spot

Once fully aroused, the G-spot becomes more noticeable as a small, hard, spongy area within the vagina, located on the anterior wall. The direct stimulation of this spot creates the sensation to “squirt out,” yet many are unaware of how to stimulate this small area. The fingers can be used to locate the G-spot by placing the index finger two inches into the vagina with the palm facing up and using a “come here” gesture to locate spot. Cowgirl and doggystyle positions also help to stimulate the G-spot and clitoris. Hard thrusting has also been known to help with G-spot stimulation. Special toys that contain an upward curve help with locating and stimulating the G-spot and are recommended during this process.

Control of pelvic muscles

During orgasm, the average woman is prompted to clinch down or tighten her pelvic muscles holding back the sensation to want to squirt out. In order to experience the squirting orgasm, a woman must push her pelvic muscles outward during orgasm in order to expel the fluid from the body. This takes great practice and can be achieved by performing Kegels regularly to gain a command over the pelvic muscles.

Although these findings may have discovered that millions of women have involuntarily urinated on their partners during sex, those who enjoy this type of orgasm admit that not only does it feel good physically, but it psychologically makes a couple feel as if the ultimate sexual satisfaction has been achieved. There should be no shame placed on what the body experiences during sexual pleasure.

Glamazon Tyomi is a freelance writer, model and sex educator with a deeply rooted passion for spreading the message of sex positivity and encouraging the masses to embrace their sexuality. Her website, www.glamerotica101.com, reaches internationally as a source for advice and information for the sexually active/curious. Follow her on Twitter at @glamazontyomi.