Love Advice: How to Keep It Clean After a Breakup

Love Advice: How to Keep It Clean After a Breakup

[OPINION] Don't join #teampetty just because it's over

by Shantell E. Jamison, October 3, 2017

Comments
Love Advice: How to Keep It Clean After a Breakup

Love gone wrong.

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon.

Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose.

Chris Brown and Karreuche Tran.

The list of public splits gone wrong is rather exhaustive. But does a breakup, whether between stars or civilians, have to be petty and emotionally damaging?  Not at all. In fact, one should always aim to keep it clean and classy after a relationship ends.

In case you need help, here are a few tips on how to be the bigger person after calling it quits:

Focus on the good things that came from your former relationship.

I know the last thing that you want to do is reflect on why you decided to get involved with your ex when the relationship is over, but hear me out for a second. Reflecting on why you chose that significant other in the first place allows you to cultivate positive feelings about him or her despite the relationship ending. When you view someone more favorably, you’re less likely to harbor any ill will or resentment toward that person because things did not work out. It also sets you up for your next relationship, as good energy attracts good energy.

Know what you know, not what others tell you.

It seems like as soon as you’re no longer involved with a person, everyone suddenly sees him or her everywhere doing everything. Your ex will be out with another woman or man. Your friends and associates will tell you whenever they see your former bae at the grocery store. No matter what is being dished your way, know what to pay attention to and what to ignore. Everyone isn’t invested in your joy, and the quicker you realize who you can and cannot confide in, the better off you’ll be emotionally when dealing with the recent end of your relationship.

Talk to good friends.

Those who are close to us know us best. They have experienced us in all of our glory, and if they’re as close to us as we think, they’ve also seen us at points that weren’t so flattering. It’s unhealthy to keep ANY emotions bottled up inside, but especially during sensitive times like a breakup. Talk to your loved ones about what is going on in your life. They’ll be able to provide a more calming perspective if they really care, and talk you out of keying your ex’s car or airing former boo out on Instagram.

Realize that what’s to come will be better.

One way not to be petty during a breakup is to focus on what lies ahead. If you’re a kind, thoughtful, loving, genuine person who treats people with respect, then you WILL attract a mate who deserves you. And that person will spend the rest of your time together proving why you made the right choice in selecting him or her.

More great reads

5 Holiday Gift Ideas for Your Boo

by Shantell E. Jamison

 
Stay in the Know
Sign up for the Ebony Newsletter