The soft life is defined as a lifestyle of comfort and relaxation with minimal challenges or stress. Often as Black men and women, we find ourselves facing challenges in within our careers, within our familial structures and within society as a whole. However, one thing 2023 is teaching us is that we all deserve to live a soft life. That same mantra was one of the driving forces behind Black Girl's Healing House founder Delilah Antoinette launching her Facebook group five years ago.

"After graduating from college in 2018, I was struggling with anxiety and depression, and was on my own journey with trying to find culturally-competent mental health care. This proved to be a tough journey in both the health care and wellness industries; at that time, there were no dedicated spaces for Black women to explore all the different ways to heal," the Black Girl's Healing House founder shares. "I had been part of other Facebook Groups and searched for groups solely related to Black wellness, and I couldn’t find one. So, I decided to take matters into my own hands and create one of the first virtual spaces where Black women on their wellness journeys could come together to discover new ways of healing in a welcoming and open community where they are free to express themselves." 

With a following of more than 60,000, Antoinette is helping us achieve total wellness. For her, that means that the mind, body and soul are all connected. Because whatever is imbalanced in the mind, will also manifest in your body. 

"One example of that, and something I’ve experienced myself, is lower back pain and pelvic issues. We hold a lot of our systemic trauma and pain in those parts of our bodies. And when you’re in a community where counseling or therapy is often taboo, that emotion and those traumas have nowhere else to go so that manifests into physical pain," she explains.

 We asked the Black Girl's Healing House leader to share a few ways that we all can begin our journey to living the soft life. After all, we deserve it!

3 Tips to Living the #Softlife

Exhale, release that pressure, and allow there to be self-compassion in all that you do

"You can start by prioritizing self-care, relaxation, and joy—however, that looks for you. For me, it’s practicing yoga, going to the gym, taking walks, affirmations and listening to frequencies to help remain centered," says Antoinette.

Unlearn limiting beliefs

"As Black men and women, we carry generations of seeds of limitations. Limiting beliefs when it comes to the '"'soft life'"' can include the idea that they don't deserve to enjoy luxuries or relaxation, the belief that we must always prioritize work and productivity over self-care, and the notion that indulging in self-care is selfish or frivolous," explains the Black Girl's Healing House founder. "These beliefs can stem from societal pressures and systemic oppression that devalue our worth and reinforce harmful stereotypes. It's important for us to recognize and challenge these limiting beliefs in order to prioritize their own wellbeing and happiness."

Create healthy boundaries and nurture the things that bring you joy

"Whether that’s certain foods, people, or experiences. We sometimes deny ourselves things we love just to make others comfortable, and you cannot come to a place of softness when there’s discomfort," reasons Antoinette.