Given its addicting habits, it’s difficult not to occasionally share more details than perhaps you should about yourself through social media. Most regular users can admit to sometimes getting way too into their feelings and quickly regretting publishing personal information into such an open forum. I am guilty of this myself, but some people are far guiltier of this habit than others. Enter Deion Sanders and his soon-to-be ex-wife, Pilar Sanders, who both take attention whoring to embarrassingly new lows via social and online media.

I don’t know which is more appropriate for these two: Journals or a gag order. Whatever would work needs to be handed out quickly as each is doing the absolute most over the Web and making themselves appear more and more ridiculous with each passing tweet.

Yesterday, the “Must Be The Money” rapper (and yeah, noted ex-footballer…if you’re into that sort of thing) wrote via Twitter, “Pray for me and my kids now! They just witnessed their mother and a friend jump me in my room. She’s going to jail n I’m pressing charges!”

That very same minute, Deion quickly added, “I’m sad my boys witnessed this mess but I warned the police department here that she was gone try n harm me and my boys. This is on my mama!”

On his mama or not, this is the kind of information you should only be telling law enforcement and/or people who would know your mother’s name without the aid of Google.

If those tweets weren’t inappropriate enough, Deion then tweeted a photo of himself with his sons and captioned it with “filling out police reports now! Thank God for this platform to issue the Truth.”

He means thank the Lord that Twitter provides the ability to smear in seconds. He’s not the only one guilty of this, however. Two months ago, Pilar gave a very detailed account of Deion Sanders’ “fake aunt” allegedly going upside her head in their home. The woman didn’t deny the claims in a radio interview, but Pilar accused Deion of setting the whole ambush up.

Their separation drama has been an ongoing spectacle for several months now – and both sides play active roles. There was a report from Pilar claiming that she found out about Deion filing for divorce via TMZ. Then came Deion Sanders’ daughter, Deiondra Sanders, and her claims that her stepmom is nothing more than a “gold-digging h*e.” This prompted a $200 million suit to be filed by Pilar.

Before, after, and during all that came more accusations – Deion was messing around with Tracy Edmonds and a 20-year-old model, Deion wouldn’t give Pilar and the kids any money unless Pilar paid him in sexual favors, along with allegations that Pilar was basically an extortionist who can’t be trusted.

Can some intermediary step in and inform these two that Twitter isn’t their diary and TMZ is not their personal burn book? That way their young children might escape at least some of the criticism that awaits them in light of every private detail of their parents’ mess of a marriage being indexed on Google. Seriously, shut up, you two.

I will pay their antics one compliment, though. I used to worry that posting lyrics from the Secrets album on Twitter during sad times made me look like a simp. Now thanks to those two I have a much better idea of what pathetic really looks like.

Michael Arceneaux is a Houston-bred, Howard-educated writer currently based in Los Angeles. You can read more of his work on his site, The Cynical Ones. Follow him on Twitter: @youngsinick