Another episode of “Love and Hip Hop Atlanta”, another hour of Team Bad Decisions. And if that show was a cartoon, Stevie J would be a villain like Scar. He is the worst.
Mimi Updates the Girls – Mimi tells Ariane and K.Michelle about meeting up with Joseline and Stevie. She talks about finding out about the pregnancy and bursts into tears because she’s so hurt. Ariane says she needs to know when to move on, but Mimi seems to be a glutton for punishment.
Momma Dee Hypes Scrappy Up – Momma Dee shows up to Scrappy’s new house to ask him what’s happening with Erica. When he seems less than enthused, she encourages him to get with his “BFF” Shay “Buckey” Johnson of “Flava of Love” infamy. She also tells him to “handle” Stevie’s disrespect of Erica. Oh Thug Misses…
No Love But Lust – Stevie J visits a bed-ridden Joseline, and we find out that a couple of days before, he dropped her off at the abortion clinic. She asks him if he loves her and he replies with “I got a lotta love for you” and kisses her to shut her up. That man has to have a red pitchfork in the trunk of his car. He is the devil incarnate.
Mignon Be Knowing – Erica’s mama, Mignon, and her fingerwave mullet show up to express concern about her daughter’s relationship with Scrappy. Erica assures her that they’re good and working towards marriage. “If I put myself in the line of fire, I’m prepared to get burned.” Well she’s gonna get third degree burns from Scrappy because they’re not even in the same book, let alone on the same page.
The Word is Monogamy – After being properly cussed out by Mimi, Stevie needed advice. So someone got in a time capsule, went back to 1998, found Benzino, rented a BMW and had him meet up with Stevie for boy talk. Our villain calls getting Joseline “a mistake,” as if it’s so hard to not inseminate someone. ‘Zino tells him “if you want Mimi happy, you gotta be monogamous, my brotha.” The fact that Stevie has to be TOLD this means he is a special kind of fool.
Scrappy’s BFF Rubdown – Scrappy meets with Shay to talk about how he’ll be putting them paws on Stevie for calling Erica out her name. Although it might send Erica a hopeful signal about their fizzling relationship, Scrappy says he has to step up because none of his baby mamas can be disrespected. So noble. They talk while sitting next to a pool and Shay is rocking a tiny bikini. Being the subtle flirt she is, she makes Scrappy rub her behind and legs with sunscreen, on a cloudy day, as they’re about to go indoors. Oh.
Putting Paws On ‘Em – Scrappy and Erica roll up to Stevie’s studio as him and Joseline come out. Joseline is rocking four braids reminiscent of Sean Paul’s, and her edges are looking as sparse as water in a desert. Scrappy says he doesn’t have any “toleration for the bullsh*t” and Stevie understands because he has five baby mamas himself. And I wonder if any of these men realize condoms are actually not that expensive. Anyway, as the men almost get to a place of civility, Joseline accuses Erica of sleeping with Stevie, and all hell breaks loose.
The men wrestle while the women tussle. Stevie pins Scrappy down in a bear hug all passionately. And then security jumped in and separated them and everyone went home. I don’t think one punch was landed in the weak fight.
Post-Fight Debriefs – Erica tells Mimi, Rasheeda and K. Michelle about the fight and Mimi basically facepalms as she hears that Joseline was involved. She says “I am sick and tired of hearing the name Joseline every time Stevie comes up.” You must not be because you’re still with the idiot.
Stevie goes to Joseline’s house and she asks him if he slept with Erica. He says he doesn’t remember and I wonder if he needs an iPhone app to track his bed adventures. Also, she needs to realize that not everyone wants a piece of the infested nethers of Stevie. And most importantly, he’s not even her dude. Why is she trying to fight for his honor? Stevie is NOT Sparta!
Somehow, every episode of the Young and the Ratchet aka “Love and Hip Hop Atlanta” trumps the last in drama and foolery.
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EBONY.com, Contributing Writer