Are you blessed and highly favored by your mother one day but scorned by her the next? Ever wonder how children grow up under one roof, receiving equal amounts of love and attention yet have different reactions to the same mother as adults? Perhaps the answer lies in how each child relates to his or her mom and how Mom relates to him or her.

Ebony’s mom, Audrey, gave birth to her at 15 years of age. Audrey later fell into a life of drug abuse and ultimately ended up spending several years in jail for writing bad checks. While incarcerated, Audrey turned her life around and, upon release, was looking forward to building a relationship with her daughter, whom her mother had raised. But it didn’t take long before Audrey realized Ebony harbored feelings of resentment and abandonment toward her. Then there are Angel and Marci, who grew up in a home where their mother, Carol, provided love and affection to both. The sisters attended the best of schools and graduated from college. Angel’s relationship with Carol, however, was a source of conflict and contention on a daily basis, because she somehow felt Marci, her younger sister, was favored by their mother. In reality, Angel received preferential treatment because Carol saw how Angel struggled with body image issues, low self-esteem and feelings of inadequacy. Many factors can contribute to a strained adult relationship with one’s mom. Before healing begins, there are some critical issues to take into consideration and better understand.

Read the remainder of this article in the May 2014 issue of EBONY Magazine.