It never fails. Week to week, I’m approached by men from across the globe via email or social media desperately seeking help to improve sexual experiences that seem to end too soon. How can I last longer in bed? Or, I have a problem with cumming too soon. Or, How can I maintain an erection to satisfy my partner the way I know she deserves? These questions flood my inbox so heavily, it leads me to conclude that many men have the same issue: stamina.
Erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation are the two most common sexual dysfunctions associated with male sexuality. But both can be triggered by an activity most men have adopted as acceptable behavior: frequent masturbation, accompanied by porn-inspired fantasies.
Whenever I speak to these men pleading for help, I always ask about the number of times they masturbate daily, and how many hours of porn they consume weekly. Every response I receive returns the same outcome: multiple sessions of wanking every day and countless amounts of hours surfing the ’net for adult entertainment. While masturbation is the safest form of sexual activity and serves as healthy sexual expression, overstimulation can lead to sexual dysfunctions that place a damper on a man’s sex life.
And the same rules apply to the overconsumption of pornography. While porn has served as a source of inspiration to sexually arouse since the days of Players, it can create unrealistic expectations of sexual experiences in the minds of men and cause them to disconnect from the real desires of women. Some men even go as far as having no connection with real women because their fantasies are entirely too wrapped up into the actresses who appear on their computer screens.
With sex education becoming less of a priority in the U.S. school system (only 19 states require their school districts to implement sex education), it’s practically logical for the average male to look to pornography for lessons in how to become a champion lover. But it’s just as evident that using pornography as a sole reference for sex education can be problematic. The detrimental side effects of this overindulgence have led communities of men to band together in hopes of correcting this habit.
Enter the NoFap Challenge.
Inspired by the members of a Reddit thread, Alexander Rhodes created NoFap.com back in 2011 as a way to encourage men to abstain from masturbation for a period of time to help eradicate sexual dysfunction. NoFap Challenges can last anywhere from a week to 90 days and the rules are simple: no masturbation, no edging and no porn. (“Edging” is the act of stimulating arousal without an orgasmic release.)
Each participant can choose the level of difficulty of the challenge and its duration. “Hard mode” (pun intended) involves complete abstinence from sexual activity during the challenge; it’s the level of difficulty chosen by most “fapstronauts” (the name used for pledgers). Those who commit to the NoFap pledge can choose to partake in the challenge with friends or go it alone. The NoFap site also serves as a community of support for those going through the process.
Abstinence as a form of treatment for male sexual dysfunctions is hardly a new concept. But the idea of bringing men together on a positive platform to encourage one another is fairly new, thanks to the digital age. This type of communal treatment is necessary, especially in the African-American community, where therapy associated with sexual dysfunctions is less often embraced. The NoFap challenge places the man at the center of his own improvement without the fear of judgment or condemning diagnosis.
Former fapstronauts have taken to NoFap.com to speak about improvements they’ve seen in their sexual performance thanks to the period of abstinence from masturbation and pornography. Many have reported an increase in stamina and desire, while others have documented their ability to have more meaningful connections with the world around them. Hard drives now have an increase in disk space (without all that XXX clutter), porn-induced sexual dysfunctions have been cured, and free time to pursue lifelong passions has been restored.
For the men of the world suffering with porn addiction and masturbation overindulgence, the NoFap challenge is an excellent way to use brainpower and personal will to break free from addiction. I highly recommend this challenge. For more info, visit www.nofap.com.
Glamazon Tyomi is a freelance writer, model and sex educator with a deeply rooted passion for spreading the message of sex positivity and encouraging the masses to embrace their sexuality. Her website, www.glamerotica101.com, reaches internationally as a source for advice and information for the sexually active/curious. Follow her on Twitter at @glamazontyomi.