Darryl Brewer, 56, lost his wife of 10 years to cancer. A second marriage ended in divorce in 2010. As his streak of romantic losses continued, he resigned himself to sitting on the sidelines. Ironically, that’s where he met his soul mate, Ann: at an AAU basketball game where his nephew played against her son. They celebrate four years of marriage this month. “God hooked us up when we least expected it,” says Ann, 45, who was newly divorced (her second) when they met.
We think of falling in love as a young person’s game. But delayed marriage, high divorce rates, serial cohabitation and single parenthood are putting many seeking a mate at midlife and beyond. “Every game has a second half. Whether you are in your third or fourth quarter, you win if you play your best,” says Atlanta psychotherapist Janet Page, Ph.D., author of Get Married This Year (Adams Media).
If you’re grown, sexy and back on the market, you realize the game has changed. You’re not hitting the clubs, but for the first time in ages, you might be hitting the drugstore for condoms. For women, a big issue is supply and demand. Those desiring an African-American partner face a pool limited by issues such as unemployment and incarceration. As we age, the number of eligible single men further decreases. Don’t let a man shortage dissuade you from getting out there and broadening your critera; you only need one special guy!
Read more in the July 2014 issue of EBONY Magazine.