Booty. It’s the one asset that’s always been a focal point of beauty within African-American culture. Thick thighs, wide hips and a plump, round derriere are qualities that have always been synonymous with the Black woman. But as of late, America as a whole has embraced big booty beauties all due to the rise of hip-hop’s popularity within mainstream culture.

Gone are the days of women sweating their lives away in the gym to rid themselves of jiggle cakes, and we have J.Lo, Beyoncé and Nikki Minaj to thank for that. America’s obsession with booty has become so monumental that even the slim-goodie lovers at Vogue recently jumped on the bootilicious bandwagon, naming this era the “Era of the Big Booty.” (Iggy Azalea finally brought the fashion mag out of the dark “Twiggy” ages and into the voluptuous moonlight.)

As the booty gains more praise and becomes more fetishized, it’s only natural for those obsessed with rumps to want to hump, or even lick, the backside in praise and adoration. Analingus has been something that many outside of the African-American community have adopted as a sexual practice for years, but for us, the anus has always been more of a taboo forbidden zone. Maybe not until the release of R. Kelly’s “In the Kitchen” in ’05 has the African-American community been as aware of what “tossing salad” really is, a clear indication of the growing “booty eating” trend. 

Commonly, many Black women have been apprehensive about adopting the practice because of the taste and smell of the anus, but this is something that can be handled through proper hygienic practices and incorporating the use of flavored lubricant during performance. African-American men, however, have the issue of being emasculated by the act, holding on to the firm belief that any type of anal play makes them effeminate. 



By resetting one’s thinking through becoming educated about analingus, couples in the AA community can experience a pleasure like no other. If cake is on your menu, take a look at these tips and tricks to get you headed in the right direction.

Consent Is Required

Before venturing into the backwoods, full consent to be there is required. Talking about this act before getting into it is ideal. But if in the heat of the moment the urge to feast on hot crossed buns arises, paying attention to body language is essential.

Use the hands to rub and explore your partner’s backside (during an erotic massage maybe), working your way in between the cheeks. If your partner flinches or tenses up when moving into this area, proceed with caution and usher in relaxation. If resistance persists, directly ask your partner if going into this area is okay. It’s important to get this permission in order to establish trust and safety

Isn’t This Just for Gay People?

Some believe that rimming is only for homosexual men, but in actuality, this sexual technique is for anyone to enjoy. Many men, especially Black men, have an issue with anything touching or going near their anuses for fear of somehow jeopardizing their masculinity, but being sexually free and exploring every erogenous zone of the body doesn’t make a man gay—it makes him a more well-rounded sexual being unafraid of receiving the highest amount of pleasure he can find. Put aside those archaic (and misinformed) thoughts about analingus and become comfortable with being sex positive.

Cleanliness Is of Highest Priority

Sex becomes unlimited and enjoyable when two people are comfortable and clean enough to explore each other openly, and when it comes to any type of sexual activity dealing with the anus, cleanliness is critical. The anus has been seen as taboo for centuries because it’s the part of the body responsible for removing waste. But now that this place where the sun doesn’t shine has the spotlight, it’s important to clean thoroughly before sexual exploration. 

Taking a shower or bath before getting into anal play is ideal, but if you’re in a pinch for time, taking a few baby wipes and thoroughly cleaning the area will do the trick. Never enter into anal play before cleansing the area first. This reduces the risks of spreading harmful bacteria into the mouth that can cause sickness. Clean the bum and have some fun!

To Groom or Not to Groom Is the Question

It may be difficult for some to believe, but hair does grow in the cleft of the booty. Just as some detest the feel or look of hair being present while dining down south, the same feelings may apply to experiencing the feeling of hair when coming through the back door. Waxing or shaving is totally subject to the personal preferences of the receiver and the giver, so have a talk with your partner about grooming standards before heading to the back door for erotic tongue play.

Relax

Before performing, it’s essential to get your partner to relax. A buttocks and hip massage with edible lubricants is a great way to start off. Taking the fingers and massaging the anus also helps with a person becoming comfortable with anal play. Just remember to take things slow and to be gentle. Even the softest of touch can create spine-tingling sensations.

Spread Those Cheeks

The anus can be difficult to access, so in order to make the rimming experience the best it can be, it’s necessary to spread those cheeks. Massage them firmly yet sensually, working your way towards the crack of the butt. Once your thumbs are parallel to the opening, grab a fistful and spread those cheeks apart. In so doing, the anus will be completely exposed and ready for tossing. As you’re performing, continue to massage the cheeks in a circular motion using the tips of your fingers. This will create double the stimulation of two erogenous zones at once.

Oral Sex Rules Apply

The location may be different but the same oral sex rules apply. A combination of tongue action, lip stroking and finger play can be used when performing analingus. Insertion of a finger or a toy is optional, but the main focus of this technique is to stimulate the hundreds of nerve endings contained on the outside of the anus. Use the tongue in a circular motion, use small flicks or long strokes, and use the tip of the tongue or the flatness of the full pallet. (Avoid using teeth.)

Avoid Gassy Foods

There’s nothing more awkward than a person farting during sex, and it’s even more awkward (and highly disrespectful) when a person breaks wind in another’s face. If cake is on the sexual menu as a precursor to the main intercourse, avoid eating foods throughout the day that can cause gas. Dairy, broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, wheat and carbonated beverages can contribute to a gassy gut that can make rimming awkward. If these foods can’t be avoided, make sure to void the colon before getting into any activity.

Whether a first timer or a beginner, venturing into the “dark side of the moon” may make one feel uncomfortable at first thought. But by establishing comfort, cleanliness, and safety, couples can experience the joys and benefits of stimulating this newly trendy erogenous zone.

Glamazon Tyomi is a freelance writer, model and sex educator with a deeply rooted passion for spreading the message of sex positivity and encouraging the masses to embrace their sexuality. Her website, www.glamerotica101.com, reaches internationally as a source for advice and information for the sexually active/curious. Follow her on Twitter at @glamazontyomi.



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