Michael Arceneaux, EBONY.com contributor and Master of Shade, calls out five of his biggest gripes from the past week. Rejoice and be read. Follow Michael @youngsinick.


1. Stop Counting Migos’ Money: Leave it the insufferable, argumentative, nitpicky sect of social media to find fault in a charitable donation. I don’t know how much money the members of Migos have in their bank accounts, but I do know artists like TLC and Toni Braxton sold several million albums and still ended up needing a payday loan to cover their electric bill to keep the TV that runs on bootleg cable back in the 1990s. As much as many of us love “Fight Night” and every other song they have that sounds exactly like it, artists don’t make much money from single sales and Spotify streams. Needless to say, that $1000 might have been the best they could do. Or maybe they gave more. Who knows? What I do gather, though, is that they gave more money to their old high school than your complaining asses gave to yours. Shut up.

2. Why Are So Terrible, Iggy Azalea?: No shade to high school dropouts, but you can tell Iggy Azalea stopped paying attention to learning around the same time she upgraded from training to big girl bra. In a recent interview, Eve and Jill Scott were asked about Iggy and why she raps with the cadence of a Black girl born in the American South.

Eve said: “The blaccent. Is that horrible? A lot of people gonna get mad at that, say what you want, but f*** it. I’m saying it in a sense that…she’s from a different place. I’ve said this before, It would be dope to hear her with HER swag, what are you, who are you and what is that? That’s the only reason I say that. [Australians] are so dope. That’s my only thing.”

Eve did acknowledge that people abroad grew up with hip hop so she represents for “somebody.” Jill Scott was just as fair, only noting that to her, Iggy sounds like Eve and Da Brat.

In response, Iggy wrote via Twitter: “There’s a difference between being yourself and being your stereotype. When people I’ve never met say I should act more like “myself.” I feel like they’re really saying ‘act more like how I sterotype you to be, so I can feel comfortable.’”

Good Lord, she’s dense. Iggy, when you’re speaking normally, you do not sound like the Black woman you’re impersonating poorly on your songs. That means we know you’re not being yourself. No one is stereotyping you when they say, “We wish you would rap in your native tongue ‘cause this stereotypical Black woman gimmick you’re doing now ain’t it. UGH. Someone deport her already.


3. Really Newsweek?: How does one purport to tackle sexism in Silicon Valley by creating a sexist cover? Is this supposed to be tongue in cheek? Don’t bother saying yes because the answer is no regardless of what you tell me. Now that I think about it, how many women were involved in the making of this cover art? I can’t imagine the answer being more than “zero.” The woman doesn’t even have a face. Why? Why? Why?

4. Cover That Baby’s Head, Kanye!: Okay, okay, even though I feel like he sounds the off key fool on the track, it’s sweet of Kanye West to release a whole song about his daughter, North West. However, in the teaser clip he released during his interview on Ellen, I noticed there was a scene in which it was raining and cold and that beautiful baby didn’t have on her hood. Kanye West had his hood on, though. Look, I don’t want to call CPS, but don’t get your baby sick for the sake of getting the best shot. I already worry about this child because her parents are BFFs with narcissism and delusion, and her grandmother has an on again, off again relationship with the Devil.

5. Sin Sounds So Good On You, Coko: This isn’t so much a read because really, I could never read Coko from SWV. Hell, I’m still mad at y’all for not buying her solo album, Hot Coko, in droves. Tell me “Tryna Come Home” still doesn’t knock! I dare you!

In any event, I just wanted to thank Coko for finally performing one of my all time favorite songs, “Downtown.” Granted, Coko’s band mate, LeLee Lyons basically coerced her into doing it, but the point is, Coko performed the song for the first time since the 1990s. Now, a bit of advice: don’t stop. Yes, Coko, I know your family is ultra Christian and you’ve dropped two gospel albums. At the same time, most of the SWV catalog is about screwing and/or snatching someone else’s man. If you already got the man in bed, you might as well give him the traffic directions on stage. Can I get an amen?